demilition

We choose to share what we want to share.

Be for attention, sympathy, gratitude, thanks or just plain old boredom.

If you can't take the criticism someone may give about something - don't share it.

I miss pouring my heart out into my writing.

I'm liking my artistic style at the moment - I want to pursue this and continue it.

Everyone of my inspirations are coming and blending together to create the real Demi. To help me figure out where I want to be and what I'm going to end up creating. Moulding me into a more inspired individual.

Don't stay gorgeous; increases insanity.

Don't repel these forces; breaking community.

Each song is a memory of what we've been through. The troubles our eyes have been subjected to.

Each line is a phrase we couldn't write ourselves. Confusing on so many levels.

---

You can't create imagination. You have to imagine it.

And that's the hardest part of being artistic.

You can't create without imagination.

Creation is the byproduct of your dreams and aspirations.

Imagination is the byproduct of your mind running wild; going insane.

To be profane: it's my speciality.

I'm torn between doing the right thing and being unhappy.
Torn between doing the wrong thing but finding myself happy.
Torn between fights with my parents. Or just letting them roll over me, insult me, degrade me, lecture me, interrogate me.
Now I'm upset, pissed off. Regretting anything that happened.
I want to call Liam; but I don't want to wake him up
I want to scream at everyone else; I don't want to get grounded
I want to run away; I don't want to cause a scene
I want to be a different person; I don't want to lose myself.

Who should I be?
Who should I listen to?

I'm wrong. already.



I'm nauseated.

They don't care.

I'm depressed.

They think its just because they are forcing me to do the right thing.






Stop the press; stop the talk; stop the questions; stop the appointments; stop the reasons; stop the causes.
Stop.
Stop me.
Stop the time.
Start teenage life?

1 When was the last time you cried?
Probably sometimes this last few days. Friday I'm pretty sure.


2 Have you ever faked sick?
dang str8 motha bleepah.

3 What was the last lie you said?
i don't lie.



And that's a lie.

4 Have you ever cried during a movie?
Yeah. Who hasn't?

5 Who was the last person you couldn't take your eyes off of?
Whooooooo dooooooooo yooooooooou think?!

6 Have you ever danced in the rain?
Yeah, with Irene. And it's on video. I don't know where that video is. School's cup 06. Lolmajor.

7 Have you ever been drunk?
well now...

8 Have you ever tried drugs?
lolz, negative on the illegal drugs, thumsup for the paracetamol!

9 Do you smoke?
smoking is h0m0

10 What's the farthest you've ever gone on a dare?
Taken my pants off in the dark behind a chair in front of my cousins who couldnt see anything when i was 10. rofl.

11 What is your full name?
Demi Prue Faithful Cambridge

12 What is your blood-type?
something cool.
LOL!
GET IT!?

13 Have you ever been in a car accident?
no, never.

14 How old were you when you recieved your first kiss?
I believe I would've been...11?

15 Who was your first kiss?
My first boyfriend.
Doesn't count as a boyfriend though.

16 Have you ever had an online relationship?
depends. how. you. mean.

17 Have you ever had phone-sex?
how awkward would that be. lol. just...weird. too weird.

18 Have you ever been rejected by a crush?
oh yeah. primary school days were sweet as.

19 What is your favourite sport to play?
idk. volleyball. touch is pretty fun.

20 Have you ever made a prank phone call?
yeah

21 Have you ever said
oi yeah everyday.

22 What's your favourite childhood memory?
The massive newspaper boulder in grade 7. OH man that was awesome. Matt Carruthers. Freaking ace kid.

23 Is there anything that you have done that you regret?
not sure. I mean, probably sure, but I don't know if I want to think about regrets.

24 What do you want to be when you grow up?
Photojournalist in the music industry.
To be precise.

25 What is your political persuassion?
Barack Obama fo lyf bro

26 Have you ever had cybersex?
roflmajor no

27 Do you believe in g-d?
I think

28 Do you believe in love at first sight?
no. not really. Lust, chyeah.

29 Do you believe in karma?
Most of the time.
Like when peoples tyres go flat.

30 Who was your first crush?
Justin Black. Grade 2.

31 Who do yo uhave a crush on?
well. His name is Liam Holmes. And its a tad more than a crush.

32 How would you describe yourself?
intricate. Over thinker. Annoying. Independent. Scaredy cat. Afraid. Confusing.

33 What are you afraid of?
the massive huge ocean. Creepy d00dz. Losing the one person who seriously means the most to me, ever.

34 Are you religious?
Yeah, but im not Nazi about it.

35 What does your screen name mean?
it's Demilitarize.
Which means "To eliminate the military character of"

36 What person do you trust the most?
I guess Liam.
My parents are slowly majorly losing it.

37 Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend?
oooo!OO!OOoOoOOOooOoOo my first legit one wasnt really legit. Jarrod.

38 What is the best compliment you have ever recieved?
theres a few.

39 What is the meanest thing anyone has said about you?
lol.

40 What is the longest crush/relationship you have had?
Well, this ones been going for about a year and a half now. So yeah. I'll go with that, yeah?


41 What is your greatest strength?
Who said I was strong?

42 What is your greatest weakness?
Someone by the name of Liam pursades me easily.

43 What is your perfect pizza?
oh man, how I could answer this awesomely, but im not.

44 What is your first thought when waking up in the morning?
Time.

45 What is your first thought before you go to bed?
FIRST? dont you mean last?


46 What college do you want to go to?
a one with stuff.


47 Do you get along with your family?
76% of the time.

48 Do you play any instruments?
Guitar
Bass
Drums
Keyboard.
Your Face.

49 What kind of music do you like?
Mostly everything. Except rap. Turn that shit off, yo.

50 Do you think you're attractive?
Every now and then.

51 Would you ever get a tattoo?
For sure.

52 How many piercings do you have?
currently 7

53 Who makes you laugh?
Frank Woodley

54 Who would you want to be tied to for 24hours?
Tom Delonge.

55 Have you ever seen a dead body?
CSI is full of them.

56 Do you have a celebrity crush?
Tom Delonge

57 What is one thing scientists should invent?
Tom Delonge clone. For me.

58 Have you ever broken a bone?
no siree.

59 What happens after you die?
Life goes on.

60 Do you watch or read the news?
Not really anymore. I used to be pretty hxcore into it. Now, its a waste of thought space.

61 What stereotype would you label yourself as being?
Retard.


62 Would your friends agree with that stereotypic label?
Yeah.

63 If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
I don't want to change it.

64 If you could go back in time to one point in your life, where would you go
Depends, would I have to re-live it all again?
But. Maybe. None.


65 If you could change anything about yourself, what would you change?
i dont like this one

66 Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
tbh, yes.

67 Have you ever played strip poker?
oi, get onto it liam.

68 Would you ever lie to someone to make them feel good about themselves?
hopefully not

69 What do you want your friends to think about you?
That I'm okay whatever I am.

70 Whats the biggest argument you've ever gotten into?
Parents. Anything in the last year.
Over it.

71 HAve you ever bitten someone?
I used to do that for fun

72 When's your birthday?
July.


73 Have you ever stolen anything?
idk really

74 Do you make wishes on shooting stars?
nono, 11:11 though.


75 Whats the most you've ever eaten in one sitting?
I used to get in trouble for eating.
Now its vice versa.

76 If you could go back and change one day, what would it be?
I got the day.
I'm not saying.

77 Do you remember your dreams?
not entirely.

78 Have you ever been in love?
you could say that

79 Are you a morning person or a night person?
Noon

80 Do you have any phobias?
Family phobia.

81 What's the meanest thing you've ever done to someone?
Couple of stuff, but its not like I remember.

82 Have you ever been to the hospital (other then birth?
hey there.

83 How many screen names do you have?
one.
the others jsut for email crap.

84 Do any medical problems run in your family?
retardness.

85 Have anyone ever been disowned from your family?
Pfft, you'd think i'd about to be

86 Have you ever had a nightmare?
Yeah, I used to have a lot.

87 Do you say meaner things to your friends or your enemies?
Friends XD

88 Would you ever participate in a threesome?
Me, Tom Delonge, Liam.
I'm up for it, yeah.


89 Would you ever pay for a prostititue?
I already do.

90 Have you ever mooned or flashed someone?
I used to do that for fun aswell XD

91 Have you ever cheated on your bf/gf?
no wai hoe-zay

92 Have you ever laughed so hard you peed in your pants?
ACTUALLY. YES. ROFL.


93 Have you ever written a love letter?
yes

94 Have you ever attempted suicide?
No.

95 Do you prefer boxers or briefs?
briefs.

96 Have you ever been in a fistfight?
no really. joking slaps. but thats it..

97 Do you have any hidden talents?
I don't even have talents to start with.

98 What is one thing you want me to know about you?
I don't want you knowing anything.

99 What is one question you wouldn't want me to ask?
You'd ask it then.

100 Do you usually prefer books or movies?
Who cares?

101 Who is your favourite person to talk to?
My cat.

102 Who is always able to cheer you up when you're sad?
Loliam

103 Would you ever have sex before marriage?
Yeah, I guess I would

104 Who do you talk to most on the phone?
Liam.

105 Do you have a secret that yo'ure ashamed of?
probably.

106 Do you prefer british or american spelling of words?
Australian

107 Have you ever gotten detention?
yeah. freakin hell. fridays are shit.

108 How do you vent your anger?
LO@L!L$!OK!$LELO!$(U$
hah.

109 Have you ever been on a diet?
I love amber's answer to this.

110 Would you ever date someone younger than you? Older than you?
Younger, in the same year. Older, of course.
NO! THEY HAVE TO BE SAME DAY, SAME HOUR.


111 Is your best friend a virgin?
Why, yes they are.

112 What's a rumor someone has spread about you?
i love men.

113 What's the kinkiest thing you could ever actually see yourself as doing?
Lol, I actually wouldnt mind dancing...on...a bar. Thatd be pr(i)etty cool.

114 What's the meanest thing anyone has ever done to you?
said that.

115 What's the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you?
Liam got Short stack to sign my shirt.

116 Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness?
OI THIS SURVEY IS AWESOME AS.

117 Have you ever cut yourself on purpose?
not. cut. but. hey.

118 Have you ever wanted to murder someone?
everyday. freakin' shaun. lol.


119 Have you ever hated someone?
shes blonde. my grade. fag. yeah. sharna.


120 Do you prefer talking on the phone or online?
person

121 Do you consider yourself popular?
no, i like it this way.

122 Would you ever tell the person you have a crush on that you like them?
he better know.

123 Have you ever had a crush on an enemy?
actually, yes.

124 Have you ever had a crush on a best friend?
he became my best friend.
And the other one is.
And was.
And hopefully will be.

125 What is your favourite book?
Invisible monsters.
Haunted was pretty sweet.
Perks of being a wallflower.
Survivor.

126 Do you have a collection of anything?
Collection of stuff on my keychain.
Collection of crap.
Badges.
Cds.
Bandanas.

127 Are you happy with the person you are becoming?
we'll see.

128 Are you a different person now then you were 5 years ago?
oh hell yeah


129 What do you see yourself as being in 5 years from now?
Being awesome.
Awesome people.
awesome life.
Cool shit.
Thats as far as I got.


130 Are you happy with the life you have?
89% of the time

What's the last thing you put in your mouth?
a beverage of a hot sort.

Have you ever kissed anyone named Matt?
don't think so. no.

What was the last song you listened to?
right now.
First one on the blog - Farewell

Where was your default picture taken?
lol, cymhs.

Can you play guitar hero?
easy level ^^

Who was the last person you drove with?
Liam

When was last time you walked further than a block?
5 minutes ago.

Is there someone you want to date?
lolmajor.

Name something that made you laugh today?
yeah, alot!

What brand of digital camera do you own?
canon EOS 300D
pentax
canon EOS 10D

When was the last time you saw #3 on your top friends?
who is three?
tim?
then today.


How late did you stay up last night and why?
10:45pm. Footy show was loud.

Who was the last person to text you?
Liam

If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Definately

Have you ever been kissed under fireworks?
Negative.
Oi liam, get on it.

Do you believe ex's can be 'just friends'?
i believe they can also be best friends.

Do you prefer to call or text?
depends who it is, lololol

When was the last time you cried really, really hard?
omg. maybe...A WEEK? OMG. RECORD!

Where is your biological father right now?
downstairs.
tv room.
watching tv.

Have you ever seen somebody get shot?
noooooo

Where are you right now?
the room that contains my bed that belongs to me

What bed did you sleep in last night?
mmmmmmmmine!

Did you ever go to a special learning center?
Sort of...lol

What happened at 10:00am today?
school. Art. :D

Name someone whose name starts with the letter "A"?
Do i have to know them?
Alex. - Jew.


Who took your profile picture?
me.

Who was the last person you took a picture of?
Mark and matt i think.

Was yesterday better than today?
Im not sure, yes. Today was definitely better.

Can you live a day without TV?
yep

Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
the middle?

What were you doing at 9pm last night?
maxin it up @ the top thats made for your lap.

what is your ring tone?
Six feet under the stars.


Are you mad about anything?
maybe. i think. a little. nah. yeah. yep.

Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
who with?

When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
I think i was today. or yesterday. Yesterday, ill go with that.

Where's the DEL button on life?
Where's the backspace?
The ESC key?

Cheer me up, please?

I really wanna get out and get some more inspiration going.
I really get those ideas flowing and my mind working...but nothings coming.
Maybe I need to see some movies or something.
I don't want to see some movies.
I'm considering reading my Chuck Palahniuk books all over again. Haven't got the time with the other book I'm reading at the moment though. Oh gee.

1.
Where were you THREE hours ago? in the car.

2. What do you think of your LAST kiss? I like him.

3.
Are you wearing SOCKS right now? yes.

4.
When was the last time you went out of STATE? umm. new years eve.

5.
Have you been to the M0VIES in the last 5 days? negative.

6.
What did you see? see above

7.
What was the last thing you had to drink? a shit peppermint tea. I now feel sick

8.
What are you wearing right now? long blue pants. Black and white striped shirt.

9.
What was your last purchase? a shirt or something

10.
Last food you ate? i dunno. shrooms or something. was a stirfry.

11.
Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Liam

12.
Have you bought any clothing items in the last week? yes

13.
Do you have a pet? yes

14.
What did you do last night? Liam was over

16.
If you could be anywhere you want where would it be? asleep.

17.
What is the last thing you purchased online? a shirt or something. probably a long time ago.

18.
One thing you hate about yourself? my weinus.

19.
What’s your favorite soup? this shit one i made one time.

20.
Do you miss anyone? yes sir.

21.
Last movie you saw? i watched a bit of Pick of Destiny

22.
What are your plans for the day? went to the city. saw liam. came home. went to see my social worker. went to see a hypnotherapist. came home. got bored.

23.
Did you have fun today? you could say that

24.
Who is your last text message from? Liam

25. Were you an honor roll student in school? in grade 6


26.
What do you know about the future? tomorrows wednesday

27.
Who was the last person you rode in a car with? mother. father.

29.
Do you have a tan? not really i suppose.

30.
How old do you want to be when you have kids? meh .like. 28ish. i dont know.

31.
Did you meet anyone new today? don't really think so. omg. yes. i did.
32.
Do you have any tattoos or piercings?yeah.

33.
How do you like your soda? non existant. OMG!

34.
Do you like hot sauces? ?!

35.
What are you doing tomorrow? seeing liam. going somewhere.

36.
What day is tomorrow? wednesday

37.
What is your current mood? a bit nauseated

38.
Why? fuck off

39.
Do you remember the first person you ever kissed? yeah

40.
Do you have a crush on anyone right now? just a bit.

41.
If you could be on a TV show, which one would it be? Pokemon.

42.
Why? friggin ace.

43.
Have you ever watched a movie and just “had” to do what they did? Transformers. lolol. oh, and swan princess. omg.

44.
Do you have a “face” you make in the mirror? LOLZ. WHAT?! HAHA. omg yes. no. what? hey.

45. Ever use someone else’s toothbrush? no. not really.

46. Do you like/love the person you got this survey from? we're married

47.
Can you whistle? hai

48.
Can you wiggle your ears? yes

49.
You have a song that comes on that you just “have” to turn up and sing to? many. oh so many.

50.
Who are you thinking about right now? im sore. and a bit sick.

Wards won't help
Whether I go backwards or forwards
Take it as a forewarn
I'm torn.

I'm going on hiatus.
What from?
My fucking life.

Has anyone ever told you, you have pretty eyes?
Just today actually


What kind of computer do have?
asus


What have you learned today?
a fair bit

How many different people of the opposite sex have you cried over?
a couple

How tall are you?
5 ft 4

What do you want to be when you grow up?
meh

What time do you usually wake up on the weekends?
like....6........

What is your favorite subject?
art or biology. occasionally english.

What kind of cologne do you wear?
All of them. I'm a fucking rose.


Country music?
yes

If you could live in any other country, which one would you pick?
America. They speak some form of english.

Where were you when you heard about the World Trade Towers?
walking passed the tv room and being all "wha?"


Are camera phones worth it?
depends - do you want it or not?

Is there anyone you'd die for?
yeah

Spell your name without an E,R,S,H,K,I,M,A,:
D.

What are you listening to?
Moneen.


Is any part of your body sore?
yes. fucking ice skating. what the fuck.

Are you happy with your life right now?
As much as I have been the last 6 months

How do you earn money?
bitch around the house.

Are you outgoing?
lol no.

Where do you wish you were right now?
anywhere but brisbane. or tasmania.

Are you slowly drifting away from someone close?
yeah. a couple actually.

When was the last time you felt unbearably guilty?
today...

When was the last time you held someone’s hand?
weekend

Who can you tell everything to?
liam!

Who was the last person you talked to on MSN?
liam!

Last words you spoke?
i was singing.

Did you date someone you regret dating?
roflcopterlmaololpickleslawl. yes.

What is your natural hair colour?
brown..?

Was the last concert you went to?
soundwave



Do you play guitar hero?
I have

Do you like somone?
yes

Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
warm

Who is your last text from?
my mum

What is the last movie you watched in theaters and with who?
like, 3 years ago.

Who did you last share a bed with?
liam.

Do fish have feelings?
If you cut open a fish would it bleed? yes. So obviously- yes. Gosh.


What do you currently smell like?
a mess of cologne.

Do you feel like dancing?
everyday

What are you going to do after this?
be bored


Who were the last people you ate lunch with?
cameron, daniel wong, and some other weiners.


What are you thinking about?
this answer. now the song. now posting it. now about typing. now about the people i had lunch with. now school.

what a waste of time.

I want to grow my hair.
I want to get the fuck out of school.
I want to travel.
I want to be able to play volleyball without getting yelled at.
I want to be able to make my own decisions.
I want to be trusted.
I want to have faith in myself.
I want to be comfortable.
I want to have freedom.
I want to rid of the shitty people who make me miserable.
I want to be around the people who make me happy all the time.
But most of all...
I want Ed to realise I've already divorced him and I have better peole to hang out with.
Seriously

Hey little miss fuck up

where you going today?

downtown, hell bound or just walking around?

I'm really not lying

Just dying in hiding

But now i feel like this seasons between us.

Trying to pull their shit on again
pulling me down, upsetting me
Ruining the already painful situation
deploying guns and grenades that scream
Untrusting situations, trying to find my lies

Ridiculous answers and unpractical solutions
bang bang, they fire their treatment
the only thing they're going to do is help me cry
tring to pry
circumstances drain my time, my emotions and just bring me to pieces
they reek of my denial
and i sense they seek a dier

Sanction keeping me sane
homebound rightforth
yet stuck between the pages
Addiction, admission
scared of submission

you cry like the crow I've got pulling at my hair
screaming out and prying
spying
when you'd rather be flying
lets spend the day
to catch up on life
tell me about the skies and i'll remind you of my lies
Black feathered brown eyed bird
come fly home to me

pitter pat
you lousy rat
raindrops fall on your black top hat
ensure
eyes venture
across the room to another dimension
little white drug
to help me unplug
emotions of acid come washing through

Refusing the possibilities
for escape and refuge
take back those cup made of shars of glass
they cut my mouth with their lips made of syringes
inside my body
your gurgle and churn
till all the remains is guilt and refrain

For once this year
I feel sustain
I feel dependance and self acceptance
For once I'm not scared to wake up or fall asleep
Death is no longer an option
It's just a consequence
changing habits
means chaning lives
means chaning me

thinking about words you can't commute
you stumble and you fall
yet the phrases carry on
the irony and sarcasm
get caught between the powerlines
they crackle as the message is misread

highlight lives
to dance between the shadows
singing tragic falsettos
and reminising about your first love

Dreams being confusing
yet appealing none the less
determining the cause
you're caught between the seams

facing the times
replacing lines
changing your thoughts to compete with other possibilites

creating new perspectives
determine the cause
diagnose the goddamn problem
and turn back to square one.

something always comes back again
to represent and reiterate
commerce and converse
exchanging the boundaries we fail to setup
at yet when you compact the decision
you always end up at nil

self talk, salf harm
its always the same old thing
day out day in
those small white pills that aren't helping

Talking, and talking
trying to figure out these mental blocks
everytime i try
i find another complication
that destroys the situation